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90+ St. Patrick’s Day Jokes for Kids (Free Printable!)
Looking for some laughs to celebrate all things Irish? You’re in luck! Print out these family-friendly jokes featuring leprechauns, pots of gold, and other St. Patrick’s Day favorites.
On March 17th, everyone is a wee bit Irish! Inspired by St. Patrick’s Day classics, these jokes cover a little bit of everything, from Ireland and shamrocks to leprechauns and rainbows. They’re lighthearted, easy to understand, and sure to get giggles, making them perfect for sharing at home, in the classroom, or at holiday gatherings.
TIP: Having kids read jokes puts a fun and entertaining twist on literacy practice, especially when they work in partners and take turns reading them aloud to each other.
St. Patrick’s Day Jokes for Kids
What do puppies celebrate on March 17?
- St. Paw-trick’s Day!
What do you get when you cross Christmas with St. Patrick’s Day?
- St. O’Claus
Where does Valentine’s Day come after St. Patrick’s Day?
- In the dictionary.
What does Dr. Seuss eat for breakfast on St. Patrick’s Day?
- Green eggs and ham.
How do Irish musicians show off on St. Patrick’s Day?
- They play the brag-pipes.
Why was it so hard for St. Patrick to make a decision?
- He was stuck between a sham-rock and a hard place.
What happened when St. Patrick fell into the Irish Sea?
- He got wet.
Why are parades so popular on St. Patrick’s Day?
- It’s March!
What do snakes say on St. Patrick’s Day?
- “Hiss me, I’m Irish!”
What do rabbits say on March 17?
- “Hoppy St. Patrick’s Day!”
How do chameleons celebrate St. Patrick’s Day?
- By the Wearin’ of the Green!
What do insects sing on St. Patrick’s Day?
- When Irish Flies are Smiling
Who is St. Patrick’s favorite superhero?
- The Green Lantern.
Where do golfers spend St. Patrick’s Day?
- On the green.
How do you know if a St. Patrick’s Day joke is funny?
- Everyone is Dublin over with laughter!
Why did St. Patrick drive all the snakes out of Ireland?
- It was too far to walk.
Irish-Themed Jokes for Kids
What type of spells do Irish witches like best?
- Lucky charms!
What do you call a fake diamond in Ireland?
- A sham-rock.
What’s green and sings Irish songs?
- Elvis Parsley.
What is an earthquake called in Ireland?
- A Shamrock Shake!
What did the Irish dancing teacher say to her students when they messed up?
- “You made a jig mistake!”
Where do actors hang out before the show starts in Ireland?
- In the green room.
Why do backyards always look so nice in Ireland?
- Their grass is always greener.
Why did the potato move from Ireland to Paris?
- It wanted to become a French fry.
What do Irish dancers do when they want to take a little break?
- Put together jig-saw puzzles.
St. Patrick’s Day Jokes About Leprechauns
How do you know if a leprechaun is very old?
- They can remember when rainbows were still in black-and-white.
What do leprechauns eat the day before they go grocery shopping?
- Left-clovers.
What do leprechauns drink in the morning?
- Green tea.
What did one leprechaun say to another before the big game?
- “I-rish you luck!”
What big event do nerdy leprechauns look forward to all year?
- The Lepre-Con.
Why are leprechauns such good gardeners?
- They have green thumbs!
What do leprechaun astronauts travel in?
- Shamrockets.
Where do granny leprechauns love to relax?
- In shamrocking chairs.
Why are leprechauns sad on March 18?
- It Ain’t Patrick’s Day.
What do leprechauns put in their piggy banks?
- Lepre-coins!
Why did the leprechaun cross the road?
- The light turned green.
What’s a leprechaun’s favorite playground game?
- Red Clover, Red Clover.
When do you call a pessimistic leprechaun?
- A lepre-can’t.
How do leprechauns tell time?
- They look at the sham-clock.
Why don’t leprechauns like running?
- They’d rather jig than jog.
Where do leprechauns like to go on vacation?
- Somewhere over the rainbow.
What did the police officer say when arresting the leprechaun?
- “The jig is up!”
How do leprechauns protect their pots of gold?
- With sham-locks.
Where do leprechauns stay on vacation?
- A lepre-condo.
How many gold coins can a leprechaun throw in an empty pot?
- Only one—after that, the pot isn’t empty anymore!
Why did the leprechaun want to go to the moon?
- He heard it was made of green cheese.
How do you measure a leprechaun’s value?
- He’s worth his weight in gold!
What makes leprechauns so kind?
- They have hearts of gold.
What kind of meal do leprechauns like best?
- A potluck dinner.
Why did the leprechaun climb a ladder?
- He was tired of being down on his luck.
How do leprechauns make gold soup?
- Well, they start by adding 14 karats to the pot …
How do you know when leprechauns are mad at each other?
- They give each other the gold shoulder.
What do you get when you cross a leprechaun with a frog?
- A leap-rechaun!
What kind of dog do leprechauns prefer?
- Golden retrievers.
TIP: The black and white St. Patrick’s Day images you see in the jokes are from our free printable St. Patrick’s Day coloring pages for kids. Print them out now!
St. Patrick’s Day Jokes About Rainbows and Pots of Gold
What kind of bow can’t be tied?
- A rainbow!
Where do rainbows go after being arrested?
- Prism. (It’s a light sentence, but it gives them time to reflect.)
What will you find at the end of a rainbow?
- The letter W.
How did the rainbow do on the big test?
- It passed with flying colors!
How much does a rainbow weigh?
- Not much, they’re pretty light.
How do you find the treasure at the end of the rainbow?
- Follow the golden rule!
Why couldn’t the leprechaun ever sit still?
- He was always chasing rainbows.
What do you call the mallard who found the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow?
- A lucky duck!
Where do plumbers look for the pot of gold?
- At the end of the drain-bow.
What happened when the Irish chef left a pot of stew out for too long?
- She wound up with a pot of mold.
Why did the rainbow go to school?
- It wanted to get a little brighter!
What will you find at the end of the rainbow on April 1st?
- Fool’s gold.
St. Patrick’s Day Jokes About Shamrocks and Four-Leaf Clovers
Why didn’t the woman iron her shamrock?
- She didn’t want to press her luck!
What’s the difference between wisdom and luck?
- One is clever—the other is clover.
What happens when you find a four-leaf clover in a patch of poison ivy?
- You get a rash of good luck!
What did the shamrock say to the four-leaf clover?
- “I’m green with envy!”
Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick’s Day?
- Because real rocks are too heavy.
What did the Irish referee say at the end of the match?
- “Game clover.”
What did the shamrock say when someone challenged it to a duel?
- “I’m a clover, not a fighter.”
What do you call a clover covered in glitter?
- A glam-rock!
Why did the shamrock buy a suitcase?
- It was planning a trip to the clover-seas.
What do you get when you cross a clover with a sweet potato?
- A yam-rock!
What happened when the Irish sailor lost his balance?
- He fell clover-board.
What did one shamrock say to the other?
- “Do you be-leaf in luck?”
St. Patrick’s Day Knock Knock Jokes
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Erin.
Erin who?
Erin as fast as I could, but I couldn’t catch the leprechaun.
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Irish.
Irish who?
Irish I could find a pot of gold!
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Warren.
Warren who?
Warren anything green for St. Patrick’s Day?
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Sherwood.
Sherwood who?
Sherwood like to find the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow!
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Shirley.
Shirley who?
Shirley you remembered to wear green on St. Patrick’s Day!
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Sam.
Sam who?
Sam-where over the rainbow!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Will.
Will who?
Will you go to the St. Patrick’s Day parade with me?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Juno.
Juno who?
Juno it’s St. Patrick’s Day?
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Mustache.
Mustache who?
I mustache you to carve the turkey.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Noah.
Noah who?
Noah good pumpkin pie recipe?
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive St. Patrick’s Day!
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Otis.
Otis who?
Otis a great day to be Irish!
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Annie.
Annie who?
Annie body want to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day?
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Holly.
Holly who?
Holly-days are the best time of year.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Justin.
Justin who?
Justin time to wish you a Happy St. Patrick’s Day!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Noah.
Noah who?
Noah good place to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Harry.
Harry who?
Harry up and kiss me—I’m Irish!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Peas.
Peas who?
Peas have a happy St. Patrick’s Day!
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